His Banner Over Me is Love
My dear friend, Sandy, just lost her son, Tim. In a moment of unbelief and great torment of the soul, he chose an action that ended his own life. A young man on the brink of graduating from seminary, Tim's life was characterized and eulogized as one of gentleness, patience, humble servitude, passion for Jesus and the Bible, intense study, love for believers and unbelievers alike, self-discipline, fervent prayer, wise counsel, and a host of other godly fruit.
In a comment on another blog, I wrote these thoughts, because (until last May) I have had moments of overwhelming darkness and temptations toward suicide. Yes, I love Jesus, and yes, I know He loves me. I love the church. I love God's Word and am devoted to reading and studying it daily. Much of it is "hidden in my heart." But do all these things prevent a Christian from experiencing depression? Is a person any less spiritual because his or her temptations (and yieldings to these temptations) happen more on the inside--in the mind and soul--than someone whose snares are outwardly apparent? I don't think so. People who have never really been hit by the heavy artillery of mental illness do not understand life on the front lines. I have been there, and were it not for my Warrior King, Jesus, waving his banner called "Love" over me and lifting my eyes to behold that banner, I think I would have made Tim's choice. So strong is my longing for Jesus and heaven and so weak is my will to suffer earthly pain or watch others suffer, that I often say, "Take me, Jesus." It's not that I don't love my life or my family and friends--I do, VERY, VERY much!!--but sometimes I've just wanted to lay down, close these earthly eyes and wake up looking directly in the beautiful, loving eyes of my precious Lord.
I wrote the following comment on Kristin's blog:
How cunning of Satan to lie to us that we don't need others and they don't need (or love) us. That we can atone for our own sins by just trying harder. That everyone else is doing better and is full of joy. That our pit is deeper than their pit. What rotten lies from the pit of hell! How I thank God for Truth. Jesus is Truth, He is what I clung to, and cling to, when Satan tempts me to despair. How precious His Word is. He has the words of eternal life, because he IS the Word! Speaking His name is the equivalent of speaking the Word! When battling the darkness, I had only the strength to bow my head and utter, "Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!" and the demons fled. They know His Name and obey Him. Tim's death may just have opened the church's eyes (and by church I mean all of us who have placed our faith in Him alone). Pretty clothes and painted on smiles often cover ugly wounds and deep hurts.
Danielle commented on Kristin's blog also: Thank you, Kristin.... I'd love to talk... about how God can use us to minister truth and healing. Or even just talk about what helps when a person is in such a situation.Although the Lord hasn't yet allowed me to go through such a dark depressing season of the soul, I long to know how to best minister to those who are. So often I feel helpless in dealing with others who are in deep depression. How do I encourage them?
To which I answered, " The one thing a depressed person needs to hear over and over (and the not-depressed person) is this: "God loves you." And also "I love you" (if it's true. Don't lie if you don't love them.) But at the very least remind them that God loves them. Sound simplistic or trite? Don't ever underestimate it. If someone is battling lies, tell them the one truth that no one can doctrinally argue: God loves you.
In a comment on another blog, I wrote these thoughts, because (until last May) I have had moments of overwhelming darkness and temptations toward suicide. Yes, I love Jesus, and yes, I know He loves me. I love the church. I love God's Word and am devoted to reading and studying it daily. Much of it is "hidden in my heart." But do all these things prevent a Christian from experiencing depression? Is a person any less spiritual because his or her temptations (and yieldings to these temptations) happen more on the inside--in the mind and soul--than someone whose snares are outwardly apparent? I don't think so. People who have never really been hit by the heavy artillery of mental illness do not understand life on the front lines. I have been there, and were it not for my Warrior King, Jesus, waving his banner called "Love" over me and lifting my eyes to behold that banner, I think I would have made Tim's choice. So strong is my longing for Jesus and heaven and so weak is my will to suffer earthly pain or watch others suffer, that I often say, "Take me, Jesus." It's not that I don't love my life or my family and friends--I do, VERY, VERY much!!--but sometimes I've just wanted to lay down, close these earthly eyes and wake up looking directly in the beautiful, loving eyes of my precious Lord.
I wrote the following comment on Kristin's blog:
How cunning of Satan to lie to us that we don't need others and they don't need (or love) us. That we can atone for our own sins by just trying harder. That everyone else is doing better and is full of joy. That our pit is deeper than their pit. What rotten lies from the pit of hell! How I thank God for Truth. Jesus is Truth, He is what I clung to, and cling to, when Satan tempts me to despair. How precious His Word is. He has the words of eternal life, because he IS the Word! Speaking His name is the equivalent of speaking the Word! When battling the darkness, I had only the strength to bow my head and utter, "Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!" and the demons fled. They know His Name and obey Him. Tim's death may just have opened the church's eyes (and by church I mean all of us who have placed our faith in Him alone). Pretty clothes and painted on smiles often cover ugly wounds and deep hurts.
Danielle commented on Kristin's blog also: Thank you, Kristin.... I'd love to talk... about how God can use us to minister truth and healing. Or even just talk about what helps when a person is in such a situation.Although the Lord hasn't yet allowed me to go through such a dark depressing season of the soul, I long to know how to best minister to those who are. So often I feel helpless in dealing with others who are in deep depression. How do I encourage them?
To which I answered, " The one thing a depressed person needs to hear over and over (and the not-depressed person) is this: "God loves you." And also "I love you" (if it's true. Don't lie if you don't love them.) But at the very least remind them that God loves them. Sound simplistic or trite? Don't ever underestimate it. If someone is battling lies, tell them the one truth that no one can doctrinally argue: God loves you.
posted by Zoanna at
11:49 AM
4 Comments:
Zoanna, I am going to email this to a friend of mine that confessed this last week to suicidal thoughts. What words of encouragement you have here and I think it means so much coming from someone who deals with it. Thank you for your words on how to encourage someone walking through this.
Oh, Bethany, I am aching for you and your friend. (For the sake of this comment, I'll assume your friend is female.) Please know that I am praying for her and you as I read this. Does this person profess Christ as Savior? If so, keep pointing her towards Him. Most likely she is angry with someone who has hurt her, someone she used to trust or wishes she could have trusted. OFten there is great shame involved, and almost assuredly, unforgiveness. Rather than blast her for the sin of unforgiveness (though it is grievous) start by gently asking her what SHE has been forgiven of. Keep her talking. Don't fear confrontation (although if she's violent you need a strong hubby or other godly man nearby. I don't know what your doctrine of demons is, but they are real and they will spew ugliness and hatred and will get physical sometimes). But no matter what, call on JESUS' name out loud, over and over. And remember the words "I love you." Does she know you love her? Can she be ugly and know you will still be loyal? She doesn't feel very lovable, if at all. She sees herself thru a different filter. Keep Jesus at the forefront of your talks with her, not her offenses or her offender, but the Savior!
"Keep Jesus at the forefront of your talks with her, not her offenses or her offender, but the Savior!"
This is great advice, Zo, and something I need to remember for myself along with someone I know who is battling depression. I really appreciate your post.
My husband recently purchased "Spiritual Depression" by Martyn Lloyd-Jones for me. I've only read about a third of it so far and am really impressed with his insight. He's so good at explaining how temperament, physical health, circumstances can put us in a position where depression is likely, but that unbelief of God's truth is the
"ultimate and final cause" He discusses how to know our weaknesses and "take ourselves in hand" applying God's truth to our lives. We can't just believe it once and move on. We must apply it daily as a prescription.
Really I've been quite shocked at how discouraged - even despondant I can become when I listen to myself, my emotions and fears rather than recounting God's faithfulness. It helps to remind me to turn my gaze outward rather than excessively inward. I often thought I was the only Christian who struggled this way. It's a good book for teaching us how to do the hard work of dealing with this weakness in ourselves or caring for others.
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